health information
Is it too soon to open up to my new boyfriend about my issues?
Question : Is it too soon to open up to my new boyfriend about my issues?
Just over 2 week ago, i started going out with a guy that i have known for almost a year.
The thing is that i am going through a rough time in my life at the moment… but i don’t want him to think i am completely crazy, so i don’t talk to him about these things.
BUT.. the problem is that in about 2 months, i am planning to go into an inpatient hospital eating disorder program for my Bulimia… and there is NO way that i could NOT tell him about it!. I mean, he will notice if i’m suddenly never around.
He seems like an understanding guy.
Like, if i have a facebook status that suggests that i’m down, he will call/txt me to make sure im okay.
What should i do?
- Tell him?
- Break up with him?
Please help me…
inpatient eating disorder programs
Best answer:
Answer by energeez
your afraid of him leaving… you dont want to hold on to something or someone you have to force to love you. Tell him and if he doesnt stay, it was an unhealthy relationship anyhow. If he does, tell him thank you.
-
-
#2 written by L 1 year ago
In response to that last comment. Not a good idea to be talking about gaining muscle tone. First–most bulimic people are normal weight or over weight. But most importantly, weight and the outside look is not the ‘real’ problem.
I had bulimia for 10 years and sometimes struggle still. I was so afraid to tell people that I was bulimic and seeking help, but when you get to the point where you can–there is a freedom. You really find out who your real friends are and you no longer have to keep the yucky feelings that come along with bulimia all to yourself.
I felt so much shame with my bulimia. If I/We had cancer that would be a more accepted disease, but the reality is that bulimia is taboo and many people view it as vanity. I never thought I would find a guy to support me through my binges and purges, but I did. He is the best thing that has happened to me. I am able to be honest with him and discuss my slip ups. Also, he is willing to be gentle and supportive during my ‘episodes.’ When I first became bulimic and told my boyfriend at that time, he didn’t know how to handle it. That was a big blow and I was not sure anyone would ever want to be with a bulimic chick. There are guys out there that will be supportive, don’t waste your time with someone whom you can’t be your authentic self.
-
#3 written by romantic sam 1 year ago
Oh Lord. Bulimia. First of all I am very happy to hear that you are getting help honey. That’s just wonderful, I hope all goes well. You beautiful person you, if you have a boyfriend now it must mean you are pretty inside and out right?
… Well you must know just as I do how important it is to have a strong support group for you right now. So when you tell him about the going away for 2 months for a Bulimia Program thing, you should ask him to take time to think about if he could really be there for you. If he could be patient, understanding, helpful, caring, and supportive. You can tell him that it would be okay for you guys to take a break in the meanwhile. Because if he ends up not giving you the support you need… you might feel like it was because of the way you look or are as a person. And that low esteem is the last thing you need in these moments. ((((By the way.. if you need to go in a bulimia program that must mean your almost in good shape. you should now stop doing those stuff, and start gaining muscle and meat to tone the pretty little body of yours. I believe you can make it.
I know you won’t starve yourself to death. )))))… Tell him you will understand if he can’t handle your problem, that it is important for him to be honest with you if he can’t handle being your bf while u r bulimic
or… you can break up with him, even if he doesn’t want to… and explain to him how you first need to find yourself, your balance, and your self-esteem before having a relationship.
Because if you can’t take the proper care of yourself, how can you care for a boyfriend?? You can’t. So if he is willing to wait, then great, that shows he can be faithful, loyal, and that he really likes you. If he isn’t willing to wait, at least he was honest and saved you all that grief… Good Luck with whatever path you choose.
-
#4 written by Officious Seeing Eye Byatch 1 year ago
First, I’m really glad you’re going for help for bulimia. It’s a horrible disease and the sooner you deal with it the better. Second, since it’s only been a few weeks with him get a feel for what he can take – if he doesn’t “get it” then he shouldn’t be your boyfriend! You may not be perfect but you are a work in progress, and if he wants perfect he’s only going to make your bulimia worse.
Good luck.
-
#5 written by Blue Wolf 1 year ago
there is no reason to smash his heart with a break up. just tell him. this could make you two closer. if you continue to hide it from him and it comes out later he might ask why did you keep something like that a secret.
how you trust him is up to you; but don’t keep important things like this to yourself in a relationship.
- Comment Feed for this Post
I would only tell him a very small amount at one time. See how he responds. If it feels positive, share more bits of information. It’s nice to hear you are taking care of yourself. Best Wishes.