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How do I tell my children I had stage 4 ovarian cancer?
I have a daughter 12 and son 11th I have just found out i Stage 4 ovarian cancer and may have 3-5 years left. I am the working mother, and her father is the stay at home dad (our consent, since the adoption when they were babies). How can I tell them I have cancer, is surgery and chemotherapy, and how do I prevent them from ovarian cancer examined c on the Internet? How much do I have to tell them?
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#2 written by msmagoo 1 year ago
I am so so sorry you have to go through this. You don’t fool kids today they know more than you think.Tell them all you feel they need to know at this point. Who knows God may heal you and that the end of the story. Cancer is not always a death sentence.
I will put you on our pray list. And you and your family will be in my person prayers. God be with you my sister. -
#3 written by Patrick 1 year ago
Hi Lisa,
I have some advices for you although they are a bit different from what you asked for.
First, you don’t have to accept that this cancer will kill you in 3 to 5 years. If that is really what you believe that is probably what will happen.
I don’t know if you believe in God, but if so, have faith the he can heal you. If you don’t believe in God, then have faith that you can heal yourself! If you don’t think that this is possible then I can give you a little kick start. Just take the time to look at this website here : http://tinyurl.com/6pt26p
If you want to know more about achieving total success in every area of your life, I invite you and everyone here to also take a look at my blog : http://SelfPerfecting.BlogSpot.com
Wishing you success, health and happiness. You truly deserve it.
Patrick
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#4 written by Denisedds 1 year ago
I am so sorry. What a difficult situation to be in. When you were told you had cancer chances are it was very overwhelming for you, you may have not heard everything the doctor said and it probably took a while to sink in. Your children will likely go through much of the same process and their reactions and thoughts will likely be different, because as we all know males and females do not think alike. There is no need to tell them everything at once, what you tell them should be age appropriate and let their questions guide you. Give them time to let it sink in and to think of questions they want to ask.
I’m sorry but you will not be able to stop them from searching the internet for answers and if you try they will think you are keeping something from them and often what they imagine may be worse than the truth. Be open about it so they know it is okay to talk to you about it. Tell them you want them to get information from you, so they are not worried their questions may hurt you. Let them know by your actions it is an open subject; discuss your treatment with them, let them you when you are tired, when your surgery is scheduled and just explain as simply as you can what is happening. It is a process for your entire family.
Please do not ever think it is best to keep it from them. It isn’t. From time to time I see a case where the patient does not want their family to know and legally no one can tell them. Until it is at the point there is no choice and it is up to an ER doc to tell them. It is just heartbreaking and very difficult for the family. How lucky your children are to have a mom who always thinks of them first. Bless you all.
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#6 written by matador89 1 year ago
Lisa S,
You know these children, and you know which is the best way for them to be told. There is nobody in the world who can share this news with them but you. It will cause them great pain, but depending on the bond that you have with them, you will all come through this moment and probably find that you are the closer for it. How much do you tell them ? — You tell them everything. Do not let anyone else do this, it is for you to share with your close family. You might like to work together and research this so that you all ‘learn’ together.
Make the most of the time that you have left and I hope that it will be a joyous time. I wish you well.ALL ANSWERS SHOULD BE THOROUGHLY RESEARCHED, IN ANY FORUM AND ESPECIALLY IN THIS ONE. – MANY ANSWERS ARE FLAWED.
The information provided here should not be used during any medical emergency or for the diagnosis or treatment of any medical condition. A licensed physician should be consulted for diagnosis and treatment of any and all medical conditions.
Hope this helps
matador 89 - Comment Feed for this Post
hi sorry i too am waiting to see my ca dr for an abnormal ovarian mass 43 yrs so my kids are 19 22 and i said i will need your help if i have cancer and i am refusing chemo and radiation why make myself sick i’m going to live and let live . and let GOD control it , they said do whatever you need mom they seen enough cancer in real life and on TV so your kids are not too young ,i know kids there age are sexually active so they already know lots, be honest and say Mommy has ovarian cancer and i am going to have treatments and we will work this out together, mommy may have days of crying and sleeping and anger but its the cancer not me, share with them anything that helps them understand you need them , tell them i may need help can someone make me tea or toast that makes me feel better maybe you can make me pictures to hang up simple joys, so they feel needed and our life is in Gods Hands Gods timing is not our timing, my brother had stage 3 of 4 brain cancer and is in total remission or healed as its been 9 yrs 5 yrs was his marker so hes a true survivor of brain cancer yes he chose chemo and radiation but refused round 3 and told the dr GOD healed me NO more.. so honesty is best no matter how hard,